I count the words on this site on a near constant basis. Despite what others have eluded to when discussing my writing—even in personally communication—I don’t actually value pure verbosity for verbosity’s sake. However I must fully explain every substantial or minute detail in anything I communicate, as I am obsessed with making sure of full understanding. Not just of the subject matter, but of my place in the relationship between myself and those who I communicate with.

Back to this site and my counting of words. I am obsessed with numbers in general. They mark achievement, as well they often align nicely and my brain has a special place for those numbers. 100,000 words written is now a goal of mine. And I have 1,187 words to go in order to hit that number.

You will now note that I fudge things in life to achieve certain numbers more quickly. Sitting at 1,187 words before this article started, it is plainly obvious that I’m going to hit 100,000 words fairly soon. But with my OCD, I’d rather be in control of that. Am I cheating? I don’t know—are there rules?

I will thusly open myself up to something I do often in other places. This is an OCD episode, and I’ve promised myself to let readers of this site into most all of them live and in person.

So what stands before me is the need simply for 1,187 more words. Then I’ll be at 100,000 and figure out what to do from there. I suppose I can then say, “I’ve written 100,000 words on the subject of OCD and mental disorders!” For whatever that is worth.

It’s a pretty stupid thing I cannot avoid. I’ve been looking at my word count feverishly for a few weeks now. Just because this silly round number that only means anything at all because we’ve all agreed upon a base-ten counting system.

Funny thing is no matter what I really write here, this article itself is useless. It serves a purpose unlike and diminished from that of the others on this site. This is going to soon be an exercise in, well almost filibustering. Why do you care? I’d much rather you read the other 98,813 words that come from my brain and heart in order to explain my mental disorders, specifically my OCD.

Although.

I suppose this is indeed part of my OCD. And thus I should embrace it!

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Done. This site, 100,000 words.