Twenty-Five Things I Do Not Trust

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In no particular order. Well, that’s not true, you know me. These were ordered for some effect, but in not in order of distrust or importance.

1. Thermostats
2. The digits 10, at the end of a larger number1
3. Public transportation
4. Transportation2,3
5. Gauges
6. Computer and phone updates
7. Others4
8. Anything I own not within my sight
9. Electricity
10. Anyone working on something I need from the government
11. Clocks that I did not set5,6
12. That which is random
13. Water7
14. Fate when someone mentions the possibility of a bad outcome8
15. Anyone selling me anything
16. Wasps9
17. Leftovers
18. Roofs
19. Anyone I’ve purchased something from
20. My brain
21. My brain
22. My brain
23. My brain
24. My brain
25. My brain10

 

1This will flow through to an article for another time.

2I don’t drive because of… #7.

3Note: I like being a figurative passenger, I have massive anxiety being a literal passenger.

4I can not count you in this, cool?

5I was taught to always set clocks 5 minutes ahead, thus guaranteeing I’ll always be on time. I have found it better to have all clocks set to the correct time, to the second. It enforces self-control.

6Fuck my microwave clock for being slow. Just another thing I have to set to the second every weekend.

7…Has destroyed more than you can imagine in my life. And I don’t just mean physical stuff.

8I believe in omens. Don’t start omens. Just don’t.

9No, this is not just a fear. It is a trust issue. They have plans.

10My brain.